I would like to think that, in life, we are all doing the best we can. I am, as a co-worker and great friend once told me, perpetually happy and wired as glass-half-full. I don’t do “sad” well, and I always try to bring a smile into the lives of the people around me.
When I meet people for the first time, normally one of two things happens…we either click right away, or I can almost physically see the person zip up and close me out…because, as I have been told even by my very best friends in life throughout my ENTIRE life, “You threw me at first, because I thought your perpetual happy-go-lucky persona, constant smiling, and laughing were fake.” Just to be clear…it is very much NOT FAKE, this is simply who I am. When I am around people consistently and they genuinely see that I never change my personality, they start to trust me. Nine times out of ten, they lower their guard and we become great friends. And admittedly, sometimes my “happy train” might be too much for people, and that’s perfectly okay. I made a choice a LONG time ago (when I was a child in fact), that no matter how ugly life could get, I was going to smile through it, so I do…it really is as simple as it sounds.
Lately, I have seen a recurring theme while talking to several of my friends, fellow Mommas, fellow colleagues, fellow workout buddies, etc. It seems like there is such a large amount of negativity and random judgement in people’s lives. Now, whether a person’s judgement comes from family, friends, social groups, social media, or work…it seems like all of us have people around us that produce a stream of negativity that we, as women, are constantly navigating. And not all of these negative vibes are earth-shattering…no, they can be something as simple as a passive aggressive comment or an eye-roll, but nonetheless it affects us.
It is so hard, as women, to not worry about what others think of you (this is something that I have just recently embraced). But PLEASE ladies…let it all go! You are your own shining star, and every SINGLE one of us, has something beautiful to share with the world…to heck with what other’s may think.
I know for a fact that every woman in my life brings something extraordinary to the table, and the best part is, they all bring something completely different! I am so incredibly thankful that I have so many amazing women to use as a sounding board for all the various things that life may throw at me. Maybe you’re a super stay-at-home Mom who can make Pinterest snacks in her sleep, maybe you’re a kick-butt executive who runs circles around people in the office, maybe you’re a Momtrepeneur who is killing it selling any number of various products, maybe you’re a fitness enthusiast who makes women believe in their selves when they doubt their physical abilities, maybe you’re a five star chef who can make a killer casserole in ten minutes…or maybe you are the person in others’ lives that brings them the “happy”…and you don’t even know it. We don’t give ourselves enough credit for the awesomeness that we bring to others. We spend WAY too much time focusing on what we DON’T bring. As one of my friends told me this morning when we were talking about this post, “Stop living your life trying to live up to other people’s standards…live by YOUR standards.” BOOM! So uncomplicated and so TRUE!
Be who you are and be proud to be who you are! And if someone in your life is cutting you down, it may be time to cut the ties…not all relationships are meant to withstand the test of time. Our time is too precious to waste it with people who don’t make us feel anything but supported and happy.
Ask yourself today, what do I bring to the table…what is my natural “shine”? As you give it a think, I bet your list will continue to grow and grow. And if you have someone in your life that makes you “shine”, PLEASE TELL THEM! I saw a friend the other day, and called her after we left just to tell her how thankful I was for her and how refreshed I felt after our talk. I have made a mental note to try to do this more often with the awesome ladies in my life.
It doesn’t have to be something huge…maybe your sister made you laugh when you needed it or maybe just reading a text from someone reminded you how lucky you are to call them a friend. Focus on all the goodness you are and surround yourself with others who bring the goodness to you…and when you feel someone judging you…in the words of Salt-N-Pepa, “There’s only one true judge, and that’s God, so chill, and let my Father do His job.” BE YOU, BE REAL, and DON’T MAKE ANY APOLOGIES FOR IT!
Merry Monday Leisurelings!
2 thoughts on “Unapologetically REAL”
Great read! I needed this! Tara, your inspirational message e always captivate me and give me great advice I need to follow. I’m my own worst critic and I need boundaries. LOVE YOU CUZ!
THANK YOU!! You are amazing and should never think anything else! Love you!